If you want to improve at anything, first you need to have the will to do it and to know exactly what you are doing, and after that, open yourself up for a feedback which will help you achieve your goal and become better in what you do. If we never listen to a feedback that we are given there are small chances that we will move from the current point and improve ourselves. But, there is a difference between good feedback and poor feedback which may look more like a hate. Everyone has its own opinion and we should choose carefully (actually, it’s not that hard) who should we listen to.
Constructive feedback drives changes, criticism is damaging.
The thing about feedback is to know what feedback to give. Focus on the positive feedback that will bring more positive changes and performances and is more likely to be appreciated and be thankful to the person that gave it to you, rather than being useless and destructive. If you can’t think of something, better don’t give it at all, wait for the next chance. Nobody will judge you if you don’t have an opinion at that exact moment. In case you have something to say, you better be descriptive and helpful not evaluative or judgmental.
Skip using words like “good, bad, wrong, right, etc…” or the person receiving the feedback will go defensive. Instead of saying “You are doing this wrong”, go with “I have some concerns about this, maybe you should try doing it that way…”. The more specific you are, the more helpful and usable you are to the other person.
Transform it into discussion, give the other person an opportunity to respond. Maybe there is a real reason why that is done on one or another way, maybe he or she missed some case in the scenario, or there is some other reason… discuss it. It’s healthy to point the person into the right direction, provide guidance and supply useful information during the little talk.
Be descriptive, be specific, be usable.
Thank people for their constructive feedback. They are telling you because they want you to improve.